I guess I matter ...

Just a couple of weeks ago, I found myself with a half-hour to spare on a dreary Friday afternoon before a scheduled 3 pm meeting.  It was in Yorkville, my least most-favorite part of the city.  Instead of grabbing my ump-teenth java of the day, I thought!  About the old days, 25 years ago --- I have no idea why.

You see, when I arrived in Canada in 1988, I wholesaled CD’s to music stores.  Remember CDs?  Remember music stores?  Sadly there are precious few of either around today! 

Back then, my favorite customer was Harmik Gregorian, owner of Atelier Gregorian.  I called on him weekly in his store on Yorkville Avenue.  He bought my CDs.  A good guy.  He too was a recent immigrant to Canada.  From Armenia.  Both him and I were toughing it out as new immigrants.  We used to grab a coffee.  Commiserate.  Compare notes.  Exchange hints and tips.  And yeah, we used to grumble about our hardships.  Him retailing.  Me wholesaling.  Paid me on time.  I liked him … I’m probably ten years his junior, maybe 15.  As I said – good guy.

Surely in today’s era of disposable everything and everything online, his store would have closed years ago.  Like who buys CD’s now anyway?

So, with 30 minutes on hand, and less than 500 meters from Atelier Gregorian, I thought I’d walk by his store and pay respect to days gone by – surely his store would have been gone.    Some three minutes later, I found myself at the store’s door. 

I ventured in, sniffed the air and smelled the familiar smell of new CD’s.  I heard the refrains of a Beethoven Piano Concerto playing.  I knew that not only is Atelier Gregorian still standing, but it’s thriving.  But I digress. 

Not even three feet in the store, I looked up, and there was Harmik, looking straight at me.  “John Sacke, where the hell have you been,” he said, in his syrupy heavily- accented Armenian patter.  “Wow! – You remember me Harmik?”, I replied. I was disbelieving

He took a step back.  I did a double-take.  “How could I forget you, John Sacke.   You were a kid then and I knew you’d go far.  I liked your attitude.  How are you doing?”  His eyes welled up.  So did mine.  

We talked for the full 30 minutes until I had to go.  Time has passed.  Our friendship remains.  Harmik still runs his store.  From the looks of things, it’s still making money.  He’s grey now, but weathered the past 25 years well.

I’m glad for Harmik and he’s glad for me.  Isn't that what life’s about? 

Israel - My Finest Summer Ever!

This was undoubtedly one of the finest summers I’ve ever had.  The reasons?

 

1.       A great degree of seeing others with a sense of purpose.   Without doubt, seeing others with such purpose has done wonders for me too

2.      Experiencing diverse sights, sounds and sensations

3.      Enjoying the benefits of my (and my family’s accomplishments)

 

My wife, two teenaged kids and I, have just returned from a ten day trip to Israel, where we saw people with purposes, experienced diverse sights, sounds and sensations and basked in our accomplishments

We live comfortable lives in North America.  Yeah, we think things are hard.  The traffic sucks.  We work hard.  We complain a lot.  Our kids complain even more.  Nothing is perfect.  In reality we don’t fight for a lot.  In fact, we fight for very little.  Yeah, we understand the differences between victory and defeat – and that’s about it. As pro-Israel and Zionistic as I am, (I don’t want to turn this into a political discussion), the Israelis live with a great sense of purpose.  And I love that. 

I’m sure they complain.  The traffic is bad there too.  The weather was uncomfortably hot (between 33 and 40 degrees daily).  The cost of living is high – the cost of death even higher.  Much higher.  And the many Israelis I met, have fought, do fight and will continue to do so, for every inch of land they have.  It’s an unrelenting fight and one that will never end.  Right or wrong – they live the differences between victory and defeat.  They’re never comfortable, no-less complacent in their daily struggles for land – and I like that mentality.   

My take home for my (sometimes obnoxious) teenage kids: Never take what you have for granted and ensure that you have a clear purpose for doing what you do – no rolling with the punches, no whistling in the wind, but rather understand what and why you are doing what you do - and then --- go and do it better than anyone else.  Simple!

Israel’s a land of great diversity.  Given its smallness in size, it truly does have it all.  From the very secular to the ultra-orthodox, from the lush hills of Haifa to the searing desert in the Negev and from a street falafel to fine-dining restaurants, the land’s diversity is amazing.  We saw sights, heard sounds and experienced sensations that were unique.  The market in Jerusalem minutes before Shabbat (the Sabbath).  The fresh water springs in Ein Gedi.  The Dead Sea.  The ancient city of Caesarea.  The Western Wall (Kotel).  The beaches of Tel Aviv.  The beauty of Tiberias.  Rifle shooting in the Golan.  The Army base.  Kayaking on the Jordan River.  The awesome (and I truly mean that) people on our tour, including our guide Yahaloma Yigael (aka Diamond) and Benny (our driver).  Wow!!!   

My take home for my (sometimes obnoxious) teenage kids: Do differently.  Embrace diversity.  Listen to the opinions of others.  Never judge.  Do what you do with respect for yourself and love others.  Something’s you do on a trip, you’ll love.  Others – well not so much --- do it all – anyway! (and to be fair, my kids were great on the trip).

It’s no secret that I work hard and long hours.  Always have.  Always will.  It’s also no secret that I play hard. But working hard and playing hard is meaningless, unless you can sit back from time to time and enjoy your accomplishments – because it’s accomplishments that make you happy (at least, that’s what I believe).  And the Sacke family has accomplished a huge amount in an era that’s literally seen the demise of the family.  I have my wife.  We’re a well-adjusted family unit.  We have our health.  We love each other.  We have an income.  We have friends.   In other words – far as I’m concerned – we have it all.

My take home for my (sometimes obnoxious) teenage kids:  Focus on the big stuff, but never lose sight of the small stuff either.  You can’t accomplish the big stuff without first getting the small stuff done.  Live life on life’s terms, not yours.  No-one owes you anything.  Enjoy your successes and do things that create good karma.  Pick your battles – some are not worthwhile and rise above.

And in other news, I celebrated 25 happy years in Canada on July 1, 2013 and nineteen years of wedded happiness on August 7 .

Peace!

I've Lost 31 Pounds - Now What?

I’ve never thought of myself as being fat, or even “heavy” – so when I weighed myself on December 31 last year, hitting a hefty 204 pounds, I thought a little.  I’m not a huge guy.  I’m just a hair short of five foot nine.  I’d climb ten stairs and be, well – kinda breathless.  Not good!  I’d lumber around the gym from time to time, workout and then come home to a beer and a heaping plate of high-carb pasta.  You get the picture – going nowhere backwards – and in fact – just increasing the daily bloat.

I just felt the urge to lose weight, setting myself a somewhat arbitrary goal of losing 30 pounds by July 1, figuring in 6 months, 30 pounds would be reasonable.  Not easy, but reasonable – and maybe even doable.  Maybe!

If you know me well, you’ll know that I am an all-or-nothing kind of guy.  I play to win – not come second.  My methodology?  Simple!  Eliminate all pizza, pasta, rice, bread and potatoes.  Yes, I cut it out completely.  And work out for at least 60 minutes a day, at least 5 days a week.  It’s not an easy commitment.

Six months and 16 days later -    I’ve lost 31 pounds and skipped a total of 9 days this year in working out.  Yup – of the 196 days of 2013, I have been in the gym 187 days – no kidding.

I don’t deserve medals, accolades or even admiration, but nevertheless, I am damn proud and along the way learned … not only about myself, but about others – and that’s what’s most important to me.

• Don’t like squats?  All the more reason to do them!  Hate lunges?  Then do 30 minutes of them - everyday.  There’s only one way to reduce hating a certain exercise – and that’s to do it.  The reason why you hate a specific exercise?  That’s because you suck at it – and the only way to not suck at it is to practice
• Engage with your trainers.  Training people can be lonely.  People show up at your class and grumble. Then they do your class and grumble a little more.  And then they go home.  They don’t share their trials and tribulations either – and trainers don’t like that.  They want to know when they’re too hard or too soft on you. They want to know they’re delivering results and they want to know when a particular class was either very good or bad.  So tell them.  Get to know them.  Tell them you enjoy their classes (or not) – but engage.  It’s good for their morale – and most of all, it’s good for your morale
• Working out seven days a week doesn’t mean a hill-o-beans if you come home and demolish three beers and a pound of potato chips for dinner.  Matter-of-fact --- do that and you’re going backwards.  It’s been said that losing weight is 70% eating and 30% fitness – don’t forget it.  Repeat - losing weight is 70% eating and 30% fitness

So, I’m 31 pounds lighter now – can do a hard 60 minute boot camp with people half-my- age and enjoying life more than ever – and I think that’s a good thing.  

Carpe Diem! 

Ahem - would love to know what my readers have done lately - let me know

It's my anniversary in Canada - a Memoir

Today’s important for me.  And since it’s July 1, it’s an important day for Canada too.  It’s Canada’s 146th birthday and it also marks exactly 25 years to the day that I arrived on Canadian soil for the first time and became a landed immigrant.

I was 22 when I arrived here.  I was fresh-faced, naïve and full of energy.  I’d created a decent life for myself in South Africa, had a girlfriend – left her behind.  Came to Canada – with very little other than an incredible work ethic and my Dad, who’d left South Africa a year or two before me.

Today, while I am still full of energy, I’m not that naïve – and well – my face – I’ve got a touch of grey here and there.  I have my health and a gorgeous family.  I have a lot.

Make no mistake, it has not been easy – nothing worthwhile ever is, is what I tell my kids – pretty much daily – but it’s been ever so gratifying.

I arrived at Pearson Airport on July 1, 1988.  The guys at customs were eating some Pizza from a company called “967-1111” – and were astounded when I asked what “967-1111” was? (This was in the days before 10 digit local dialing even existed).  That I had no idea was a sure tell I was new to Toronto.

Well, I settled in to life in Toronto.  I got a summer job at Sam The Record Man (remember him?) and started moving and shaking – so to speak. I was making $5.75 an hour – I’ll spare the details.

My defining moment of 1988 summer was seeing the Amnesty Concert at Maple Leaf Gardens.  I had no money to buy a ticket ($60 for a ticket in the nose-bleed section), so I scammed my way in.   Five music icons took the stage – The Boss, Sting, Tracy Chapman, Youssou N’Dour and Peter Gabriel.  I felt the warm and salty sting of my tears run down my flushed cheeks during Biko and Chimes of Freedom – 2 anti-apartheid songs – made even more poignant now as Nelson Mandela clings to precious live in Johannesburg.   I only wish him and the Rainbow nation well.

In November 1991, I met Karen Pinchuk, the woman I would ultimately marry in 1994.  Almost 19 years later – we’re going strong.

We’ve two kids – Jason (almost 16) and Amanda (12) – two cats, two cars and a white picket fence … it’s all good. 

It’s a time for reflection now – and 25 years to the day later, here’s four quickies as to what I’ve learned:

• Don’t expect anything to be easy – and the extension to that is the harder it is to accomplish something, the more worthwhile it is
• Learn to laugh at yourself, ‘cause you will screw up
• Embrace the weather – Canadian weather is generally nothing to love, especially coming from South Africa’s warm and balmy climate.  That said, quit the belly-aching about our cold winters.  If you hate them that much, then go someplace else --- no-one is forcing you to be here
• Live in the present and the future – never the past.  This one’s a biggie.  Can’t tell you how many times I have hears fellow South Africans commiserate about “Remember when …”  Those days have come and gone babe!

You know, it’s strange.  I lived in Johannesburg for 22 years.  It gave me the best of everything – an awesome country, but I never felt I belonged.  It saddens me – and to a degree is worrying.  On the other hand, I feel I belong here – in Canada – some days that worries me – most days it doesn’t.  But one thing for sure – I never take my love of Canada for granted – and appreciate this wonderful country – not on some days, or even every other day – but every single day.

And you know what I am going to do right now?  Kick back – pour myself a nice cold beer, enjoy the company of family and friends, sing Oh Canada a few times and salute the country that’s been my happy home for the past quarter century.

Respect - You Have To Show Some To Get Some

Note:  Every word in this story is true.  I have neither omitted nor embellished any content to suit an agenda.  I have removed the doctor's name in that as much as I want to address the issues of respect and professionalism, I don't want to harm his practice.  In doing so, I sought legal counsel who advised that provided the content below is true (and it is), there would be no legal recourse said doctor would have against the author   Since the story below may constitute Lashon Hora, I would rather err on the side of caution and refrain from mentioning said doctor's name.

I’m in the service business.  I expect good service and I have been told over-and-over again through the years that I give good service to my clients.  I’m a pretty-easy-to-please person, satisfied most of the time.  Simple.

I also value time – mine and others.  A lot.  No matter how rich or famous you are, time is irreplaceable.  When I make a commitment to do something at a certain time, I keep my commitment.   And when others make a commitment to me, I expect them to keep it or let me know in advance that they can'T.   

Yeah, I’m human – and the once or twice a year I run late for a meeting, I call in advance to let said meeting know I’m running a little late.  And when I show up, I apologize profusely.  That’s basic manners, and I don’t think anyone would refute that.

I'm wrong.  One person that I know would refute that – Dr. John Doe, a Toronto dermatologist.  

I’d booked a 9:10 am appointment, purposely – less likely of the doc being backed up early in the day.  Twice his office called me prior to confirm and twice I said yes.  I arrived at 8:52am – his waiting room was packed – perhaps 20 other patients.  I “checked in” and was told by a harried assistant to take a seat.    At 9:47, I got shown into “Consulting Room 9”, a room marginally larger than your average broom closet.  I stand corrected, but I think there were a total of 12 consulting rooms --- and I’m thinking why on earth a doctor would need 12 rooms unless he double, triple and god-knows-what books patients simultaneously.

Now, I am all for capitalism - and I have no issue in anyone making boatloads of money the right way.  I'm suspicious though.

1.  Why would a doctor need 12 consulting rooms in addition to a waiting room
2.  Why would there be some 20 people waiting at 9 in the morning
3.  Why would my appointment have been at 9:10am - it's an odd time

You judge! - back to the story.

It’s now 10:03am, and in runs Dr. Doe.  He’s rushed.  He’s even more harried than his assistant.  A handshake.  A four second look at my hand.  A smile.  A fast diagnosis that indeed the “small wart” I thought I had on my hand is not that.  It’s something else – he spoke so fast, I could not catch what he said.

“Here’s a script”, he says as he pounds away at his iPad furiously  “It’s at the reception on your way out.”  And with that he’s on his way out of the room.

Huh?

Personality – Zero.

Bedside manner – Zero.

Wow?

“Dr Doe,” I said.  “I appreciate that we all run late from time to time.  I get that.  Running almost an hour late first thing in the morning without so much as a call in advance or an apology is disrespectful, don’t you think?”

“Yeah – well that’s how it is”, was his flippant response.  “Your prescription is at the front desk, and if you don’t want to see me again, I will happily refer you elsewhere.”

And so ends the story.  And every word of it is dead true.

It’s been years, no, decades since I’ve been treated by another human being with so little respect for others.

Dr Doe, think I’m going to come back to you?  Dream on!  Ever heard of time management?  Ever heard of manners? Well, they’re both alive, well – and um --- kicking.  

Cofficers - A New Breed in a New Economy

Vicky Weiss, a Toronto blogger and social media pro spends five days a week, in coffee shops – different ones – working.  She’s a cofficer, a new breed of freelancer, who has traditionally worked from home  but now finds herself bored, lonely and demotivated when working solo in mid-town Toronto. 

“I get distracted too easily when I work from home,” says Vicky.  “There’s lots of stuff to do that weighs on my mind when I’m there – and besides, I’m a people’s person – so working solo just does not cut it.” 

Vicky works from different coffee shops – some within walking distance of her home, others a short drive.  And if parking isn’t fee – she keeps away.   It’s not the commute to the office every day that bothers Vicky at all – in fact the change in routine is welcome.   Rather Vicky is concerned about getting reliable internet, a comfortable chair and table, and the perfect coffee wherever she happens to be – all life-bloods of her small social media business.

“It does happen from time-to-time that the store I happen to choose on any given day is experiencing internet connectivity issues – and well – that really sucks,” says Vicky.  “Without it, I can do nothing – but fortunately, the technology has developed such that it’s pretty reliable in North America now – so it’s almost never down these days.”

The coffee shops like it a lot too.   On a recent trip to a Peet’s Coffee Shop in Manhattan, I noted several people who appeared to be working on their computers.  When I returned four hours later, those same several people were there – still working.  Some were using Skype.  Others email, while others seemed to be conducting face-to-face business meetings, all over what seemed to me like countless cups of steaming java.

Closer to home, The Mad Bean Coffee House on Eglinton Avenue, hosts numerous cofficers daily in addition to mommies with toddlers and dating couples.   It’s a mixed-crowd.

“We’ve tried to create an ambience that is as conducive to working as it is for socializing,” said Brian Roxborough, the store’s owner.  The Mad Bean has about a dozen cofficers, most of who spend between 3 and 7 hours every day seated at one of the cafe’s tables – working.  And Brian doesn’t mind at all.  “Cofficers are welcome here.   We have made it inviting.  There are lots of power outlets too.  Cofficers tend to be quiet, focus on their work, and don’t say too much.  They also order several coffees a day, and eat as well – and even if they didn’t – they’re welcome.”

The Mad Bean Coffee House

Brian’s store has an aura of tranquility.  There is soft music playing.  The ambience is alluring – almost sensual.   Also, it’s not frenzied and frighteningly hot, like some of the other coffee shops I’ve visited which quite frankly, I’d have a hard time concentrating in. 

But not all coffee shops share Brian’s sentiment.   Peter Dore-Smith owns Kaffeine, a coffee shop in London, England.  The shop does not offer wi-fi at all (even for a fee) – and is no more than 60 feet away from a coffee shop that does.

“We founded Kaffeine on the notion that we be about socializing, not sitting in deathly silence glued to a computer.  We are not an internet café – we are a great coffee shop – and will always be just that – a place where you can get great coffee and sandwiches.

Kaffeine’s not a big store.  Despite the fact it’s only 400 square feet large, more than 3,000 people a week visit it – no-one using internet.  According to Smith, he likes patrons to stay less than 45 minutes in the store.   And most do.  As hospitable as he is, short stays are better than long ones.

Rasool Verjee is a global entrepreneur that commutes between London, Paris and his native Nairobi – spending equal time in each city.  His office is the local coffee shop – wherever in the world that may be.  Rasool loves the variety and the diverse clientele each store attracts.  He likes the high-end stores in Nairobi, often spending between eight and twelve hours a day in each store where he has several cups of coffee (straight black – mild please) and at least two – and sometimes – three meals. 

“It’s an adventure for me,” says  Rasool.  “I like going to the mom-and-pop type coffeeshops over the chain stores.  The internet always works and they tend to make excellent coffee – better than the chains in fact.” 

Reliable internet is not an issue for Rasool,  however, like Vicky, sometimes finding enough outlets can be a pain-in-the-derriere.  Rasool says that it’s often not easy to power up his iPad and Blackberry, given the scarcity of electrical outlets and the many people needing power to keep their devices juiced.  He predicts this to worsen as more and more people like him work from coffee shops, requiring their myriad electronic devices to be powered in today’s always-connected economy.

Meanwhile, it’s all business for Vicky and Rasool.  Vicky’s making her way to a client meeting – this time at her client’s office.  And as for Rasool, he plans on spending the day at one of his favorite coffee boites in Toronto – a place called Jet Fuel that according to Rasool makes a wicked coffee.

So Twitter Hires Its First Canadian Employee - Now What?

It all happened quite suddenly (at least from my standpoint).  One day Twitter said it was hiring its first Canadian staffer.  The next day the company said an announcement was imminent and the next day it announced it had hired Kirstine Stewart to head up its soon-to-be-established Toronto office. Or so it seemed.

Make no mistake – this is a massive piece of news and one that deserves scrutiny.  

Kirstine joins Twitter from the CBC (Canadian Broadcasting Corp) where she was executive vice-president of its English language service, having joined the organization back in 2006.  From the news release announcing her departure, it seems as if she’d been very happy there – and this begs a most interesting question --- why, did she leave. 

I may be wrong – (and I’m not afraid to admit that I’ve been wrong before) but I think it’s for two possible reasons:

• I’m not sure what Kirstine made at the CBC, and although likely hefty, it pales in comparison to what she’ll be making at Twitter – by an order of magnitude
• Kirstine acutely understands the blurring of the lines between the old and new media, as good, if not better than anyone else  --- and as such, Twitter are paying her boatloads of money to place some very big bets.  Quite possibly, to note is that Kirstine was no longer having fun at CBC – a possibility

“This is an exciting time for social media in Canada,” said Alicia Brum, Branch Manager for the Creative Group, a division of Robert Half International.   “In fact, according to our recent survey,  advertising and marketing executives expect companies to increase their investment in social media sites, such as Twitter."

 After Kirstine has identified a new office space for Twitter Canada (presumably somewhere in one of Toronto’s trendier ‘hoods), she’ll begin to build her team – her way – and without the bureaucracy that she may have encountered at the CBC.  And I think this is going to be interesting, particularly as it relates to the autonomy she may (or my not) get from the company’s San Francisco HQ.    

“We continue to see a demand for social media professionals with experience in managing branded online communities, especially those with an analytics background who help clients measure ROI," continued Brum.

You know – I've never spoken to  Kirstine, no less met her and I certainly did not interview her for this piece –but I like her style.  Yeah, I know she came under fire at CBC and I’m somewhat sad for the CBC.  Sad because there are so few women execs at the top of the Canadian TV game. Mostly it seems like a club – an old boys club.  Really, when you come to think of it, I’m not that surprised that she left the CBC.  It was a brutally hard job – and that she dealt with some pretty big bullets for a long time is testament to her perseverance.  I also wonder a time or two about the sexism and spite that may have been thrown her way that might have propelled her to leave and take the gig at Twitter.   You just never know.

I think Kirstine’s a good hire – on the surface not an obvious one , but I think good.

Why? Well, she’ll blend her old school, traditional media expertise with Twitter’s brave new frontier and for sure look at ways of monetizing their plane. 

My prediction?  Kirstine will either sink or swim in this new and very exciting high profile role - there’s no middle ground here at all.  Give her six months and she’ll be swimming strongly.  And as for me – I’m going to get back to Tweeting.   

Peace – and Carpe Diem

How To Think And Do Differently? Resign On A Cake Silly!

Having spent the best part of the past two decades in media and public relations, it’s accurate to say I’m skeptical.  Like customs officers to whom you’re trying to lie, or me whom you’re trying to fool – there’s not much I’ve either not seen or heard of.  And it takes a lot to get me excited. It just does.

Professionally, clients always ask for and expect creativity.  It’s what PR types like me are paid everyday to do.    And to make things more complex, the fees they’re expecting to pay for not only the creativity, but the execution are well --- how do I say this respectfully --- are not exactly plentiful.

Just last week, I was asked to come up with a BFI.  In the creative world, BFI is an acronym for “Big F$%^*#g Idea” .  You get the picture.

I thought particularly hard about what I could say that would make sense given expectations, time, resources required, practicality and budget. “Flawless execution”, is what I told the client my BFI was – and I meant it.  I won the business and am now executing flawlessly and fully to the client’s satisfaction.

The bottom line?  Sometimes the solution’s right under our noses – and we’re so busy looking for complexity and complicated answers to such simple questions, that we well – fail to see the trees for the forest.    

In the midst of trying to see the trees for the forest, here’s one guy who not only did that, but thought differently too.

Twenty for hours ago, no-one had ever heard of Chris Holmes, an officer on the Border Force in Cambridgeshire, England.   Sick and tired of his boss, he quit – on a cake.  Yes, on a cake – you read that right.  You see, he’s likely got his priorities right.  He’s just become a father as well as has just set up a cake making business called Mr. Cake.  Obviously, he wants to devote his time and energy to fatherhood and cake-making --- and for good reason.

In resigning on a cake, he’s obviously thinking and doing differently – and very simply and I like that a lot.  

Here’s his resignation letter – or more accurately – a picture of it on the cake he baked. 

And that got me thinking a little more about thinking differently – here’s some stuff to bear in mind ---

1.        Fashion is garbage – it’s style that matters.  Never wear something because everyone else is.  If you want to be different, then be your own role model.

2.      Keeping down with the Jones’ is not a bad thing at all – In other words, don’t do what the sheep do

3.       Keep in touch – look up an old friend or business associate for no specific reason.  Yeah, I get it – we’re all busy – but that the worst excuse for not being in touch with lots of people.  Grind out a text while you’re standing in line at the grocery store or while you’re on the john.  The old adage of “It’s not what you know, but who you know" is as true as it ever was

4.       Think for yourself – feel like a vodka tonic when everyone else’s drinking beer?  That kinds stuff happens to me all the time.  Go ahead – order the vodka tonic.  Heck with what the others say

5.       Offer to help someone – it’s the small stuff.  Offer to take your kids to school.  Help your spouse make the bed.  Help a client with something in which you’d never get involved.  Put your hand up to do something different.    Flex a different part of your brain.  You’ll be glad you did.

In other news, I’ve now lost 20 pounds – that’s the good news.  The bad?  I had my eye-glasses stolen from the gym at which I work out last night.  Trust me, not being able to see clearly sucks!  Amazing how much we take for granted even when we try to count our blessings!

 

The Conundrum of Weight Gain and Loss

The conundrum of maintaining a slim physique sure is not an easy one to understand – and as one gets older and wiser, in some ways the game gets easier, and in other ways – harder.  Let me explain.

I’m 5 foot 9 with an average physique – always having led a pretty physically active lifestyle.  No question, that despite me not celebrating Christmas (I’m jewish), December’s not a good month as far as managing one’s weight is concerned.  It’s also little wonder that January is the busiest month of the year for new sign-ups at any gym – and this is because losing weight is the number one new year’s resolution  that there is. 

So, weighing in on January 1, 2013, I decided to cut the crap – so to speak – and do something about it.  Now, to be fair, it’s not like I would call myself obese, or even heavy – but you know what I mean – the weight had slowly been creeping on – a pound here, a  pound there – a pound everywhere.

So, January 1, I decided to lose some weight – setting myself a 120 day target to lose 20 pounds.  I’m 76 days into it and down 12 pounds –this is a good thing.  My pants fit better.  I sleep better.  I look better – and most of all, I feel better.   Whether I meet my target or not, there’s a few very important things I’ve learned

1.    This is all about a battle of the mind – No question, one’s mind can be your best friend, or your worst enemy – and this is particularly true in the world of weight.  Want to lose some?  Well – then conquer your mind that plays tricks on you all the time.  Stop making food the focal point of your day.  Don’t linger ion the kitchen.  Don’t start something you can’t stop.  All small mind games – that while sounding easy – are not

2.     Losing weight is not about starving yourself – it’s about developing, implementing and sticking to healthy eating (and drinking) habits.  For sure, I’d fallen onto some bad habits – eating late at night --- and that was a killer for me.  Now, I don’t even go into the kitchen after 9 at night – ‘cause if I go in – you know what I’ll be doing

3.       Mindful eating is a biggie – and by this I mean you gotta think what you’re eating.  We’re all busy – and it’s all to easy to grab something on the way out for you to chomp down in the car – and that’s a no-no in my world.  You gotta sit at a table.  No book.  No TV.  No gabbing on the phone while you’re eating – they all distract.  Look at your plate.  Note the texture and taste of each food – trust me – it’s the way to go.  Not only will you enjoy your food more – but you’ll lose weight too when you discover mindful eating

4.       If you fail to plan, then plan to fail – is what The Williams’ dad once said.  I guess he was referring to tennis, but he may as well have referring to losing weight.  No question I’m spending more time in the kitchen these days – lots more.  But it’s worth it.  I plan my meals ahead of time, so that I’m never starving.  Got a work function where you know the high-carb killers will be.  Doesn’t cut it saying, “I'll see how I feel when I get there” – rather I plan ahead so I avoid the waist-expanding killers.   I’ll take carrots, celery and other healthy stuff.  I’ll snack.  I won’t go to the sweet table – not on your life – and it’s not easy – it’s just what has to be done.  You know?  "You gotta do what you gotta do!"

5.       Perhaps brush your teeth after the main course - Have a problem resisting desserts?   Then get the taste of food out of your mouth.  That way (and research will confirm), that you’re far less likely to eat dessert – and you know that’s a good thing.

Personally, I’m neither a dietitian  nutritionist nor psychologist – as Joe Walsh would say, “I’m just an ordinary, average guy.”  

Does this stuff resonate?  Yes?  No?  Maybe? 

I'm interested

The Classiest "I've Been Fired" Letter Ever!

Fact: No matter what anyone says, no-one likes being called out - and no-one and I mean no-one likes admitting defeat, let alone complete failure.
 
Fact: Andrew Mason's "I've Been Fired" Letter which came across my desk yesterday was the classiest I've ever read. And you're speaking so someone (moi) whose spent his entire career in corporate communications.

The letter's at http://wapo.st/Y4YTdS

Anyway, there's a few things I'm going to point out ---

1.       He opens with "People of Groupon" - I like that. It's friendly - informal. None of this "Dear Employees" or "Honored Partners" - Andrew's kept away from the flowery.  He's friendly.  Sounds like one-of-them --- a team player, even in his demise.

2.       He's jocular - saying that he's liked to spent more time with his family - yeah right. He's 32. It sets the tone for reality. And then he goes on to say the real reason why he's going. He was fired. That simple.

3.       He  is honest. No-one liked to admit they were fired. And he says it as simply as one could --- "I was fired today." And furthermore he says why we was fired. And guess what - he deserved it. And here's the kicker! He takes responsibility - full responsibility. It wasn't the team's fault. Political unrest in some part of the world was not to blame either and nor was Obama's fiscal policies or a weakening of the economy. He says, "As CEO, I'm accountable."  There's no BS here.

4.       He goes on to compliment his (now former) team. "You are doing amazing things at Groupon, and you deserve the outside world to give you a second chance." and continues by saying, "I’m getting in the way of that."   In  that words he's saying that while he did the best he could have, it still wasn't good enough --- and again he takes full responsibility, clearly wishing the company only good things.  

5.       He compliments his board - this is the very board that canned him. He goes on to say, "The board is aligned behind the strategy we’ve shared over the last few months" -and this is important too. What this says to shareholders is that the dissention (to the extent there even is any) is at a minimum --- at least it appears that way.

6.       In the next paragraph he says that he loved Groupon. Now while this may be gentle PR speak for "Groupon - you go get lost now that you've canned me", I somehow believe this guy that he really loves Groupon - and while likely of little comfort to the company's shareholders, many of whom have been skinned alive on this poor investment, I still think his heart's in the right place.

7.       In the final paragraph he acknowledges he lost sight of the customer - Business 101. And it's clear he regrets it.

8.       He ends with, "I will miss you terribly. Love, Andrew" I don't think these endearing words have ever been at the end of an "I've-just-been-fired-letter" - And these words are simple. Powerful. Awe inspiring. 

I've spent the best part of a quarter century in corporate communications.  I’ve drafted resignation letter by the dozen.  I’ve also drafted “Ive-just-been-fired-letters as well --- and none of which come close to the class of Mason’s letter. 

Now for all I know some genius PR person could have drafted this letter - the contents of which are a crock. True or not, I think this is the classiest letter ever. You?

Ummm - here's what's on my mind

There’s a few things on my mind this morning, that I want to get off my mind – and what better forum could I choose than my blog.  After all – it is my blog.  It’s also a non-intrusive medium that’s designed to be short, sweet and to-the-point.   

1.        Email’s the communications tool of choice these days – or so it seems.  I have no problem with that.  It’s fast, easy, and effective.  That said, I still get my fair share of phone calls – and I like that too.  However, in the past week I’ve gotten no less than 3 phone calls that began like this, “Umm – hi John … my name’s [fill in the blank].  You don’t know me, but I wanted to pick your brain for a few minutes.”   Now make no mistake, I love helping people.  Check – I go out of my way to help people – far out of my way and spend way too much time doing so.  But at least get to know me first (and pretend to be interested) before you ask to pick my brain.  It should also be said, that while I know I am smart – I’m not the smartest guy in the world – and therefore picking my brain may not be the best thing to pick.  But seriously, asking me to pick my brain without establishing some sort of connection with me is like asking me “Hey John, can I use you for a few minutes”.  Umm – that would be a negative – good buddy.

2.       Crap happens – so always be prepared for the unexpected.  One of my associates slipped on the ice yesterday outside his house.  Poor innocent guy broke his leg.  He was probably doing a good deed for someone, lost his footing and boom.  Broken leg.  Why him and not me, I ask.  Well, there’s no reason at all.  Perhaps he was unlucky, or simply was in the wrong place at the wrong time.  Be that as it may, I think the lessons to be learned here are twofold.  No explanation needed.

a.       Be prepared for the unexpected

b.      Never take anything for granted

3.       It was my birthday the week before last.  And I think that one’s birthday is a good time (better than any) for a little bit of self-reflection.  Hadda party.  Had friends and family over.  It was a blast.  I am very grateful for everything that I have.  See 2b above. 

4.       I’m jewish and proud of it.  I learn a little – not that I am enlightened or anything high-falutin like that, but I think I know a little more than your average garden-variety of jew (so-to-speak).  Last night I learned that there are three (and only three) things in the Shulchan Aruch (Code of Jewish Law) that explicitly states that you cannot do backwards – the shema, hallel and the megillah.  Not to get overly technical or prophetic, but from that I learned that everything has an order for a reason – and while spontaneity can be (and very often is) good, it’s not a signal to do whatever the hell you want. 

5.       Listen.  Listen again.  And then listen again.  Let’s face it – we all sell all the time.  Whether I’m trying to convince my kids that taking the garbage out is a good idea of whether my life insurance guy is trying to sell me a new policy, it’s the same.  Listen before you speak.   That way, you’ll be better prepared to recommend an appropriate course of action or solution.  I promise – it works everytime.   Oh, and that’s also why G-d gave us two ears and one mouth.

6.       In other news, I’m psyched.  I am going to see Rodriguez in New York City.  Me and a bunch of buddies are going April 7.  He’s playing The Beacon Theatre – which coincidentally was where I saw Wham in 1983.  Remember them?
 

Spring’s coming.  We’re getting about 90 seconds more light every day and I’m happy.  Have a good day!

It's my birthday - Monday 11 February, 2013

It’s my birthday this Monday.  (nudge nudge wink wink).   It’s February 11 which means that on this day in 1966, I was born in Johannesburg, South Africa.  Born at the Marymount Hospital and delivered by my grand-uncle (Herbie Kramer) – a practising gynaecologist who retired several years ago after having spent the better part of 40 years in the delivery room before the advent of all the technologies we have today. 
I spoke to Herbie a few years ago (He still lives in Johannesburg) who when I asked him about his job and what he loved most, swiftly responded, “I witnessed the most amazing miracles, daily”.  Wow!  What a career he must have had. 

I gotta say that I have a lot.  A wonderful wife of nearly 19 years.   A wide circle of friends.  Two well adjusted (if somewhat obnoxious) teenage kids – one boy, one girl. (Typical teenagers – in other words).  We also have 2 cats – and we all have our health.  We all get on with one another (most of the time) --- and well you know, as my wife said the other day --- “We’re Mister and Mrs. Joe Average” – and that’s a bad thing at all. 

So, now that it’s my birthday in 5 days, I just wanted to share what perhaps is a little wisdom (or maybe not) that’s worked for me. 

·        Appreciating what you have is not easy – but appreciating what you have while you have it is even more difficult – but infinitely more fulfilling.  Yeah, any monkey can say years after the fact, “Remember when” and/ or “Why didn’t  I make the most of it when I had it.”  That’s easy.  The trick is being grateful and showing it – while you have it and while you are enjoying it.  Last year I happened to spend three days in New York City (my favourite city) – and I made a note prior that I would appreciate it while I was there instead of appreciating it only on my return while I recounted stories to my family of what I did.  And you know what?  I actually enjoyed it more while I was enjoying it more.  This is a good thing!  Oh, and I lived in the moment too – another good thing. 

·        Know your limit and stay within it.  Clearly we all have different tolerances – and whether you’re talking pain, eating, drinking or physical endurance we all “max” out at a certain point.  The trick is knowing exactly at which point you max out and stopping before you do – well before you do.   For example, tipsy’s fine.  Beyond tipsy’s not fine.  Wasted’s stupid.    You get the picture!

·        Invest time and energy into your most important relationships.  I spend a lot of time working on relationships that are important to me.  Just ask my wife – she’ll tell you all first-hand about it.  Whether you’re looking to nurture a relationship with a co-worker or get closer to your kids – all very important relationships – it takes time --- and in most instances the time you devote to a relationship (any relationship) is directly proportional to the pleasure/ results that the relationship gives you.  Simple!

·        If you want to do something, you’ll find the time.  And if you don’t – you won’t.  Ever wonder why an old friend has not returned your calls in six months?  You’re thinking that perhaps they did not get the several messages you had left them – right?  Well – you’re wrong!  Or wondered about the person who promises repeatedly to do something and never does – saying they just didn’t have the time.  Bogus --- these people sure did have the time.  More accurately and honesty, they did not do it because they did not want to do it.  Again – simple!

·        Honesty and simplicity will always triumph over trickery and complexity.  Always.   We’re at that age now when the temptation to white-lie is increasing.  Just ask any of my friends who date online.  Horror stories abound.  There’s the morbidly obese guy who claims in his profile that he “has a few to lose” – Wrong buddy.  You have a few hundred to lose.  What about the woman who said she’s in her forties – but who’s actually 61 or the guy who lives in a basement but claims that he lives in a spacious and luxurious house.  Duh!  Say it like it is people. 

I think Marilyn Monroe said it best --- “I want to grow old without facelifts... I want to have the courage to be loyal to the face I've made. Sometimes I think it would be easier to avoid old age, to die young, but then you'd never complete your life, would you? You'd never wholly know you.” 

That said, if you’ve got as spare sec or two on Monday February 11, hit me up and wish me a happy one – you’ll help make my day.