So today, I probably had one of my worst dining experiences in recent memory. It was at a kosher hamburger place. Location undisclosed. And for those of you who know me, I am one of the most un-fussy eaters of all time. If I say an experience was bad, then it was really bad - trust me. So I thought I would relate my experience there in terms of my expertise – PR.
1. Light is important --- it sets the mood: When I first walked into the restaurant, despite it being sunny outside, it was dim inside. This is a fast food joint after all – not a steakhouse where romantics snuggle while enjoying steak avec frites. This is a burger joint for G_d’s sake. Make it light and cheerful. Darkness is melancholia – and no-one wants to be melancholy while eating a burger and fries. In PR, darkness is confusion. Lightness is clarity – and we all prefer to communicate (and eat) with clarity
2. Train your people and train them well: I was offered some fresh cut tomato slices on my burger. Nothing special. But when the lady building my burger asked the cashier whether the tomato slices should be put on the top or the bottom half of the bun, I almost did a back-flip. Perhaps it was her first day on the job - but to ask such a stupid question (in front of a customer no less) was just plain --- well stupider than stupid. In as much as you don’t ask an untrained rookie to write a news release on their first day on the job, don’t put a rookie on the front line assembling burgers for all your customers to notice some rank ignorance.
3. People don’t like the cold: So now my burger had been built and paid for. I am ready to take my first bite. Yuck. What was that cold thing I just bit into? It was the cold bun – silly me. What would possess a burger joint to serve a just out-of-the-fridge burger bun without so much as heating it? This folks is a no-brainer. Heat it up. Or at least bring it to room temperature before serving.
4. Smile: Another cardinal rule broken by both people behind the counter in today’s burger joint. Now ladies, perhaps you aren’t happy. I get that. I also have my shitty days, but never, ever, ever let your clients know that you’re unhappy. There is nothing less welcoming than being greeted by people you know wish they were not doing what they are doing. And it’s even more important to smile when you are having a shitty day than when you are having a good day. Not only does smiling make you feel better, but it also is good for business.
5. Say thanks: Without one’s customers or clients, you’re out of business. Economics 101. Yet from the instant I walked into the store until the instant I walked out there store, not only did I not see a smile, I did not hear a thanks either. And not only is that bad manners – it’s bad business too. I’d never dream of not thanking a client, no matter how much they spend and no matter what they asked for … so why was I never thanked?
6. Keep things in proportion: I’d ordered a quarter pounder burger. Fine. But it was served on a bun that could have housed a three quarter pound patty at least. Know one of the most unattractive meals you can have? A tiny looking patty in a massive-looking bun. And the same goes for PR … Keep everything in proportion. Oh, yes, perception is also reality.
In the interests of being a good corporate citizen, I’m not mentioning the name of the burger place, but I just hope they see this posting and improve. I also believe in giving second chances … will I go back? Hell yeah!
Peace!
1. Light is important --- it sets the mood: When I first walked into the restaurant, despite it being sunny outside, it was dim inside. This is a fast food joint after all – not a steakhouse where romantics snuggle while enjoying steak avec frites. This is a burger joint for G_d’s sake. Make it light and cheerful. Darkness is melancholia – and no-one wants to be melancholy while eating a burger and fries. In PR, darkness is confusion. Lightness is clarity – and we all prefer to communicate (and eat) with clarity
2. Train your people and train them well: I was offered some fresh cut tomato slices on my burger. Nothing special. But when the lady building my burger asked the cashier whether the tomato slices should be put on the top or the bottom half of the bun, I almost did a back-flip. Perhaps it was her first day on the job - but to ask such a stupid question (in front of a customer no less) was just plain --- well stupider than stupid. In as much as you don’t ask an untrained rookie to write a news release on their first day on the job, don’t put a rookie on the front line assembling burgers for all your customers to notice some rank ignorance.
3. People don’t like the cold: So now my burger had been built and paid for. I am ready to take my first bite. Yuck. What was that cold thing I just bit into? It was the cold bun – silly me. What would possess a burger joint to serve a just out-of-the-fridge burger bun without so much as heating it? This folks is a no-brainer. Heat it up. Or at least bring it to room temperature before serving.
4. Smile: Another cardinal rule broken by both people behind the counter in today’s burger joint. Now ladies, perhaps you aren’t happy. I get that. I also have my shitty days, but never, ever, ever let your clients know that you’re unhappy. There is nothing less welcoming than being greeted by people you know wish they were not doing what they are doing. And it’s even more important to smile when you are having a shitty day than when you are having a good day. Not only does smiling make you feel better, but it also is good for business.
5. Say thanks: Without one’s customers or clients, you’re out of business. Economics 101. Yet from the instant I walked into the store until the instant I walked out there store, not only did I not see a smile, I did not hear a thanks either. And not only is that bad manners – it’s bad business too. I’d never dream of not thanking a client, no matter how much they spend and no matter what they asked for … so why was I never thanked?
6. Keep things in proportion: I’d ordered a quarter pounder burger. Fine. But it was served on a bun that could have housed a three quarter pound patty at least. Know one of the most unattractive meals you can have? A tiny looking patty in a massive-looking bun. And the same goes for PR … Keep everything in proportion. Oh, yes, perception is also reality.
In the interests of being a good corporate citizen, I’m not mentioning the name of the burger place, but I just hope they see this posting and improve. I also believe in giving second chances … will I go back? Hell yeah!
Peace!
2 comments:
from michelle kahn. if this was Joe Boos then my friend Joe for whom i arranged the restaurant makeover, needs to know. if this was Burgy's Goldburger then Ronen needs to know. i find their food delicious and never have a complaint. Perhaps you were down south in the lawrence corridor where i am told they serve a burger for either 42.99 or $3.99.....
either way please tell me it wasnt one of the aforementioned clients. I treausre my loyal clients dearly and would tell them. not mentioning you of course................
Nice writing John! Maybe the problem is that Kosher restaurants don't have enough competition so they don't need to try harder. And may that is why places like Dr. Laffa is going to kick them in the buns.
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